Do you speak Politician?

I read in the newspaper at the weekend about a language called Globish. Globish is related to English, and is spoken or understood by about 1.5 billion people.

Another language which appears to have been derived from English is Politician. This language is never, or extremely rarely, spoken, and instead is found mainly in leaflets and on the 'blogosphere'. Whereas Globish is more widely understood than English, only Politicial people write in Politician. Here is an example:

"We are democrats and progressives. We propose here a fresh political alignment. Many of us belong to the Left, but the principles that we set out are not exclusive. We reach out, rather, beyond the socialist Left towards egalitarian liberals and others of unambiguous democratic commitment. Indeed, the reconfiguration of progressive opinion that we aim for involves drawing a line between the forces of the Left that remain true to its authentic values, and currents that have lately shown themselves rather too flexible about these values. It involves making common cause with genuine democrats, whether socialist or not."

This is an example of a dialect known as 'Left-Wing Politician'. It's not restricted to the 'Decent Left'. In fact, I think the dialect is strongest amongst small Marxist groups. I am as guilty as anyone of writing in this dialect, even though I don't believe that in fact we get more support or impress anyone by writing in a way which most people find weird, pompous and incomprehensible.

Antonia sent me a translation from Politician into English of the first bit of the Euston Manifesto:

"We believe in democracy and change. We suggest a new way of thinking about politics. Although many of us have left wing politics, this paper does not just reflect a left wing view. We reach out to other people who believe in equality, freedom and democracy above all, whether they call themselves left wing or not. We want to change how we think about left wing politics, because some people who call themselves left wing do not follow the principles of equality, freedom and democracy above all, and so are not left wing."

This is much better than the version above. Most people who read political internet manifestos, though, are already fluent in Politician. Writing in English rather than Politician is especially important when writing to people who may not choose to read about politics on the internet. Here is an example, from Bob's thank you letter, of the way that Labour councillors should explain what they have been doing to people they represent. There is no jargon, just a clear explanation of what he has been doing about the things which they told him were important. See in particular how different it is from the way that Labour ministers talk when interviewed on the telly:

"Please treat this letter as a big thank you for electing me as your Labour candidate in the bye election on the 21^st September.

As promised I will work hard for the Lye Valley Ward in helping with your concerns.

My priorities are at this time :-

1 ) Saving the future of Temple Cowley Swimming Pool and supporting the City Of Oxford Swimming Club. As they have no other pool in Oxford to maintain their competition status and 1000 young swimmers need help from the Labour Group to save their future.

2 ) To re open the Horspath Rd Re- source centre , which closed to lack of funding.

We have a plan in process which is being assessed at this moment and hopefully we will have some good news very shortly.

3 ) To fight the cause of residents in making sure developers do not destroy our community in over development of family housing.

I have already called three planning applications in for review. One has been withdrawn by the developer. One has been passed with it’s use being monitored in the future and one has still to come before the area committee.

4 ) To make landlords keep their property and tenants in good order.

5 ) To provide safe and modern play equipment for our children in our local parks.

6 ) To maintain clean and safe roads within our area.

During the campaign myself , Sabir and Andrew Smith spoke with many of you and we understand your concerns and what needs to be done in Lye Valley.

Residents of 100 Acres asked for a safety barrier to be put up outside the park gate to stop children running into the road.

This will be done immediately by the Council parks dept and also a new piece of play equipment will be installed at the same time.

The rubber safety matting which has been ruined by vandals will be replaced, as soon as the weather conditions are right for the laying.

Also I have had the drains cleared in Dene Rd and the traffic humps looked at regarding flooding of front gardens in severe weather conditions. This situation will be monitored by the Council.

I have reported glass on the pavement which runs from Dene Rd to the traffic lights on Horspath Rd. This has caused problems for disabled persons on their motorised buggy’s.

The cleansing dept will deal with this immediately.

Buses being late and speeding in our area has also been reported.

In the first two weeks of holding office I have attended the H.A.R.T meeting of which I am chairman .(Horspath Rd area residents and tenants assoc).

I attended the Bullingdon Community Centre meeting ,to hear of their plans for the centres future.

I met the manager of the Orinoco charity project , which supplies paint , mostly free and re salvaged garden tools etc to the public and schools.

I have attended the full meeting of Councillors at the Town Hall and meetings with the Oxford Labour Group.

Thank you again for your support and do not hesitate to contact myself or Sabir Mirza."