How to be the 'best Tories in the world'

Fraser Nelson in the News of the World (amusingly while other NoTW columnists such as Ulrika Jonsson are online, Fraser isn't) :

"Could we sign up some of Australia's Conservatives? They have the best Tories in the world.

PM John Howard is on course for a fifth election win. He's kept taxes low, got a grip on immigration and defends national values. No wonder many of the visa applications are from BRITS seeking a better life."

So to be the 'best Tories in the world' involves getting a grip on immigration so that more Brits can, erm, move to Australia.

As for 'on course for a fifth election win', the July polls have Howard's Coalition on 40%, with Labour on 47%.